Garland, TX, United States
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Happy Birthday to our Wino Cousin! My favorite light skin, Big Cuz!!! 🍷🍷🍷 MzV👸🏾Valencia We love you, Big Cuz!
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Ssssooooo.... Are you going to do an interview or not? Because, the way you going off in those comments..... It's giving you was fucking Reggie. Shit.... Tell us what you know. 🍷🍷🍷
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Me: *ring*
Big Brother Jesus: Hello this is Heaven.
Me: Big Brother Jesus put my Grandma on the phone, please.
Big Brother Jesus: Bet
My Grandma: Hey Lexis
Me: Now Grandma.... Why you ain't tell me that if I mix flour with cornstarch that it'll make the chicken pretty and crispy like this?
Wino cousin.... This chicken is so MUTHAFUCKING delicious! I done cracked the code!
I added some of the side from last night! All I need now is a Newport 100!
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I know it's late but....I didn't wake up until like three or four! I was a little hungry! 😉🍷🐒
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One time my Daddy was like "Head ...girl you are bad as shit". I was like "yeah... Duh.... It's because my Daddy was a crackhead when he got my Mama pregnant". That nigga ain't say shit else about my behavior since. 🤣🤣🤣
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Soooooo
When I was eight my Mom caught me kissing and hunching my doll baby. She was like "after you turn ten... I'm not buying you NO MORE DOLL BABIES" I was like ".... You can stop now 🤷🏾♀️". 🤣🤣🤣
As soon as I got a doll baby ....I would strip the clothes off so damn fast. Even other people doll babies. 🤣🤣🤣 The only toys that were safe around me .... Was the g.i Joe wrestlers.... Because, their clothes were painted on.
🤣🤣🤣
Here's the doll baby
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Soooooo back in 2017.....I tried to rent an apartment in heaven. And, they sent me to the mental hospital. I gave them folks hell. 🤣🤣🤣 So, after a few days they asked if I had anyone that could bring me some hygiene products. I.e soap and deodorant.
I told them to call my homeboy.
He bought my WHOLE suitcase. Y'all...I had 32 bars of soap and like five or six sticks of deodorant.
My homeboy told them folks..."Missy take like five showers a day. If she use the bathroom.... Shower. Checks the mailbox... Shower. Walks to the store... Showers. Hell if you talk to Missy for too long... Shower. I think she be going outside getting dirty... JUST so she can take a shower". Y'all why then folks kept my ass another five days? 🤣🤣🤣🤣 They called the judge. The judge told them to give me the tiniest bottle of baby wash they had. I threw that shit right back at the nurse. They lady said "alright now... Keep on...I can throw shit too". I ain't throw shit else.
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Back on my shit again...
One time...I took some Country time lemonade mix.... And, sprinkled it all over my Mama pads. 🤣🤣🤣 I was like six/seven. I folded them and put them back in the wrapper. And, placed them back in the bag. About two weeks later when her cycle came on... All I heard was "THAT DAMN MISSY". 🤣🤣🤣 You know where I ran..... STRAIGHT to Grandma's house. And, yes this was the lemonade mix that I used.
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